Happy Mothers Day...to those of you to whom that applies.
Did you happen to see this week's Newsweek and the feature
on Barbara Bush?(1) It starts out, "Mother's Day is coming, and if
you know what's good for you the Hallmark card is already in the
mail. That is, unless your mother is Barbara Bush. The First
Family has an unusual way of celebrating the hallowed American
holiday. They put their heads down and hope it passes with as
little fanfare as possible...'Did they tell you I'm not big on
Mother's Day?' the First Mom asks tartly. 'It's a big ripoff,
you know that.'" Hmm.
A bit of Mothers Day humor here. Some definitions that are
floating around the Internet:(2)
- AIRPLANE: What Mom impersonates to get a 1-year-old to
eat strained beets.
- ALIEN: What Mom would suspect had invaded her house if
she spotted a child-sized creature cleaning up after
itself.
- APPLE: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will
trade for cupcakes.
- BABY: 1. Dad, when he gets a cold. 2. Mom's youngest
child, even if he's 42.
- BECAUSE: Mom's reason for having kids do things which
cannot be explained logically.
- CAR POOL: Complicated system of transportation where
Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest
bunch of kids who have had the most sugar.
- CHINA: Legendary nation reportedly populated by
children who love leftover vegetables.
- COOK: 1. Act of preparing food for consumption. 2.
Mom's other name.
- COUCH POTATO: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions
after the kids eat dinner.
The ABC's are enough for now (there is a whole long list).
Happy Mothers Day.
As you scholars know, the Mother's Day we observe on the second
Sunday in May has its origins with Anna Jarvis. Never a mother herself,
Anna spent most of her adult life caring for her mother in
Grafton, West Virginia. Her concern was for mothers who needed
care and whose adult children were neglecting them. Out of this
interest, in 1905 Anna Jarvis started a campaign for an annual
religious celebration honor mothers. In 1914 Congress passed a
resolution providing that the second Sunday in May be designated
as Mother's Day, and President Woodrow Wilson issued a Mother's
Day Proclamation.
Anna Jarvis envisioned Mother's Day as a time of
recommitment to honoring and caring for mothers, especially
mothers who were no longer able to care for themselves. But she
was dismayed to see the way the holiday was celebrated, much as
Barbara Bush feels now. Anna lived to see Mother's Day become
the victim of commercialism, when honoring mothers was reduced to
giving flowers, cards and gifts. Anna Jarvis died in 1948,
disappointed and disillusioned that her work had been so
trivialized.(3)
Mothers Day need not be trivialized. It can and should be
more than a "Hallmark Holiday." For that matter, I will propose
the slightly heretical idea that it should not be relegated to a
celebration of those who have given birth. As the awful news
reports from our nation's dumpsters and high school rest rooms
occasionally attests, the ability to breed does not necessarily
qualify someone to be a mother. On the other hand, some of the
finest mothering I have ever seen has come from people - both
male and female - who have never had children of their own. They
provided encouragement to the dejected, fortitude to the faint-hearted, applause for accomplishment, and whenever needed, a
shoulder to cry on. You see, when we Presbyterians baptize
children, the congregation promises to help the parents raise
them:
Do you, as members of the church of Jesus Christ,
promise to guide and nurture these children by word and
deed, with love and prayer, encouraging them to know
and follow Christ and to be faithful members of his
church?
We do.(4)
The moms to which I refer - of both genders - take that promise
seriously. It is their contribution that deserves grateful
recognition on this or any Mothers Day.
I was intrigued to see the way our texts lent themselves to
this view of mothering...or, more correctly, parenting. The
passage from the 1st chapter of Acts describes the process for
selecting a successor to Judas. The apostles held a
congregational meeting and received the report from the
nominating committee, which had been given specific direction as
to who would qualify as a "Witness with us to the resurrection."
They produced two names: Justus and Matthias. Then, after
prayer, they rolled the dice, or drew straws, or flipped a coin,
or pulled a name out of a hat (whatever "casting lots" meant -
and we do not know for sure, other than the fact that, in the
ancient world this was a time-honored way of determining God's
will). The winner: Matthias (of whom we never hear again). The
loser: Justus (also, of whom we never hear again). The apostles
believed that God had chosen Matthias for this important role, so
he was selected for the work. They thus believed that God had
NOT chosen Justus, so... The point is that God CHOOSES whom God
CHOOSES. Just as everyone is not chosen to be an apostle,
everyone is not chosen for certain other roles...mother, for
example. I could be distressed that God did not choose me for
that role (and if I were, most of you would rightly think that I
was looney), or I can examine my circumstances and see what it is
that God HAS chosen me for...and then get on with it.
For what it is worth, we can note that Jesus was not chosen
to be a mother either. But there is something about this prayer
we read in our lesson from John's gospel that sounds mighty like
a mom. The scene is the Upper Room. He had spent this night
prior to his arrest encouraging the twelve. He had washed their
feet giving a lesson in humility.(5) He had shared a bit about the
future: "In my Father's house are many dwelling places...I go to
prepare a place for you."(6) He talked of their connectedness - "I
am the vine, you are the branches."(7) There was that instruction
to "love one another."(8) It was going to take that mutual support
to withstand the trials and tribulation to come. Needless to
say, they could not envision what their master was describing,
but Jesus knew. There would be tough times ahead, and he would
not be there physically with them to insure their safety. They
would be on their own.
Mothers know that feeling. Fathers too. There is the first
day of kindergarten (or pre-school, these days). Again it
happens when that drivers license is newly in hand. Once more, I
will feel it this summer when I unload the car with all my
college freshman needs to stock her new dorm room. Then, there
is that walk down the aisle as sons and daughters begin life with
someone new.
Jesus' prayer is that of a parent letting go of a child.
Listen to some of the words again, and try to hear them as if
Jesus were a mom.
Jesus says, "I have revealed you to those whom you gave me
out of the world." Mom says, "I have tried to teach them
properly." Jesus says, "They were yours; you gave them to me..."
Mom says, "Yes, I know that my children belong to God, not me,
but I know that they have been ENTRUSTED to me for a proper
upbringing." Jesus says, "They know that everything you have
given me comes from you;" Mom says, "They have learned their
lessons well."
Jesus says, "I pray for them. I am not praying for the
world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours."
Mom says, "Yes, I could pray some general prayer, but this is
very specific and it is for my kids, the ones whose welfare you
entrusted to ME." Jesus says, "I will remain in the world no
longer, but they are still in the world, and I am coming to you.
Holy Father, protect them..." Mom says, "Lord, I am not going to
be there to protect them, so YOU please be there to protect them.
Jesus says, "So that they may be one as we are one." Mom says,
"And never let them forget that they are family!"
Jesus says, "I say these things while I am still in the
world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within
them." Mom says, "let them be happy."
Jesus says, "My prayer is not that you take them out of the
world..." Mom says, "I'm not asking for any special magical
treatment for them." Jesus says, "...protect them from the evil
one." Mom says, "the drugs, the booze, the sex, and yes, the
greed, the pride, the selfishness, ALL the ways that evil can
invade and ruin a life...Oh God, help my babies."
Jesus says, "They are not of the world, even as I am not of
it. Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth." Mom says,
"I never raised them to the standards with which the world is
comfortable; I raised them by YOUR standards. Help them to stay
DIFFERENT based on the sure and certain knowledge that what they
learned long ago is true."
Jesus says, "As you sent me into the world, I have sent them
into the world." Mom says, "There was a time I left the nest;
now it is their turn. Take care of them."
Jesus sounds just like a mom, doesn't he? Yes, there is
some pain in Jesus' prayer, the pain of having to let go, having
to leave his disciples. There is no guarantee that his "kids"
will turn out right, just as there is none for ours. We cannot
do it all for our children. At some time they need to make their
own decisions, their own mistakes. A good parent knows when to
leave them and let them go. Jesus knew. No guarantees, no
proof, but prayers for safety and guidance.
If Jesus were a mom... Farfetched? Not really. And right
now, he is doing a very maternal thing - Jesus is praying for
you. The Bible says so.(9) Did your mom pray for you? Do you
pray for your kids? Your kids in your extended family, the
church? I hope so. Good moms are like that - they never, ever
entirely let go. Just like Jesus. And that is good news indeed.
Happy Mothers Day.
Amen!
1. Martha Brant & Weston Kosova, "The Queen Mother," Newsweek, 5/13/02, pp. 34-37
2. Margarette Brandenburg, via Ecunet, "Sermonshop 1997 05 11," #103, 5/7/97
3. To Celebrate: Reshaping Holidays & Rites of Passage, (Alternatives, P.O. Box 429,
Ellenwood, Georgia 30049), pp. 116-117
4. The Sacrament of Baptism, Book of Common Worship (Louisville: Westminster/John
Knox Press, 1993)
5. John 13:1-17
6. John 14:2
7. John 15: 1-11
8. John 13:34; 15:12, 17
9. Romans 8:34, Hebrews 7:25
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